Humiliation hurts pride, that’s for
sure. Nobody wants to be in a situation where he is the subject of
embarrassment and shame. Although humiliation can come in many forms, it can be
degrading to one’s self-esteem.
In this day and age for example,
where social media can give anyone an instant fame, parents too are taking the
private acts of discipline to their children in the virtual public. When you
hit up YouTube, you will catch tons of hits on public shaming. This idea of
public shaming has not exempted Singapore as well. Domains such as Stomp! have
made it accessible to the public to upload pictures and photos of unacceptable
If you happen to be in this dreaded situation, there are
helpful ways on how you can save yourself from further damage, here’s how:
Get yourself out of the situation
Neuroscientists found out that it
only takes 20 minutes to make an emotional conversation shift into another
direction. After that, both parties will be trapped into a neurologically-based
pattern that the chance of shifting can only happen after a time of separation.
So, it is better not to stay around hoping things will go better or argue with
your thoughts. You can say something like “I am not going to discuss this matter
with you at the moment,” or you can say absolutely nothing at all!
Do not take it personal
This is going to be a hard response
but while you are at the peak of your emotions and horror brought about by
humiliation, breathe deeply and take your mind off yourself to process the
factors that triggered this person to humiliate you. Staring blankly at the
person and displaying a facial expression of surprise shows how shocked you are
that such person could behave that way.
More often than not, the person who
humiliated you will feel guilt or shame after that moment. They may not say it,
but human nature tells otherwise.
When you get the chance, it is best
to talk to this person in private. You can tell him that you don’t think he
necessarily meant everything and you want to hear his thoughts about the issue.
You can be honest in saying that it put you to distress.
Experts tell us that when someone
is trying to put a shame on us and make us feel bad about our self, it is
because this person has the problem and not because you’ve committed something
Be mindful of your counterattack
Humiliation can undoubtedly cause
anger, and to make revenge can equally feel good in a way that you redeem
self-esteem. But the danger in making a counterattack can lead the person
humiliating to strike back with a stronger comeback which can make the
situation even worse. Choosing not to retaliate on the other hand, does not
mean you are weak. It just shows you don’t want to level yourself into that
kind of behavior, as much as possible.
Go on with your life
This might sound easier said than done, but it’s the only way to go. You might not be able to strike back directly as your revenge but sometimes, showing that person do not have a continued effect on you is a revenge itself.
get home from work stressed and tired, the one thing you want to do is to lie
down on your bed and relieve the stress, whether it’s watching TV or simply
talking with your partner. That’s why it’s important that you get the right
linens for the job.
thread count – even though some may say that a higher count means more comfort,
this isn’t always the case since manufacturers can always alter them using
softeners that can break down right after the first wash.
you can get the best bedsheets to make your bed feel all the more relaxing when
you finally go to sleep:
- Get it
right with design, fit, and material
three categories are perhaps the most important to consider when looking for
the right bedsheets for your room, and with materials, you can usually invest
in a high-quality blends, or even pure cotton.
the design, you can choose to go with plains or prints depending on your
preference. If you have trouble choosing what to go for, you can look to your
other pillows and blankets and find out what works better.
And lastly, be sure to get a bedsheet that actually fits your mattress – there’s nothing more frustrating than buying one that you really like only to find out that it doesn’t fit.
- Stay away
from Egyptian cotton as much as possible
may feel luxurious to touch, but real Egyptian cotton (much like most fabrics
that are one hundred percent cotton) can be quite hard to find, since it’s
grown under specific conditions along with careful washing and combing.
Even if you can’t find genuine Egyptian cotton, there’s no need to worry – there are lots of fabrics and weaves out there that are just as good and are perfect for the humid climate in Singapore, such as a cotton-polyester blend.
your bedsheets with the rest of the furniture and the overall appearance of
your room will actually be better for you in the long run, especially after a
long and stressful day when all you really need is to see your bed.
can pull off a coordinated room by looking around and determining the style and
colors used for your decor. This can span from your headboard to your
also helps to add other bedding accessories aside from simple sheets, such as
decorative pillows, duvets covers, and the occasional comforter if it happens
to be cold outside. A few cheap pillow covers can also give more life to its
gets angry at some point, and while it can be healthy at some point as a
driving force or motivation, it can also be dangerous and destructive depending
on how you express it. When you let your anger get the better of you, you hurt
yourself and other people as a result.
also manifest in different ways, so if you find yourself getting angry easily
and more often, it’s important to take the steps to calm yourself down to see
healthy way to express your anger is crucial. Instead of bottling up your
emotions and letting it stir, use them as a driver to get something done,
whether it’s to write something down or to find a way to address the underlying
reason behind your frustration.
2. Take deep breaths
tenses up when you’re angry, so to loosen yourself up, breathing deeply is the
keep this trick in mind especially when you find yourself getting angry or
frustrated in public, and more so when you’re at work. As much as possible, don’t
“lose it” and go into a fit – when you do, you automatically lose.
Instead of doing that, take a few deep breaths and take a moment to objectively assess your situation.
3. Understand where your anger is
step to resolve your anger is to think about the reason why you’re angry in the
first place. That way, even if you can’t avoid them or resolve them, you’ll be
able to anticipate them in the future and have more time to repair.
It also helps to rehearse different reactions to different scenarios. By visualizing a scene where you get angry and imagining different ways to respond to it, you give yourself different options and better ways to respond the next time around.
4. Go for a walk
you really need to give yourself a moment to clear your head – and even more so
when you come across something that really ticks you off. And when this
happens, it’s completely okay to do so as a calming activity.
Doing this gives yourself a mental or physical escape from the situation, and time to think over your responses better and more clearly.
5. Know your signs
people show different signs when angry, and so do you. Whether these are
clenched fists, trembling, or being flushed, these can escalate into an
outburst when you don’t catch yourself in time.
Once you do
manage to catch yourself, you can give yourself time to take a few deep breaths
and think things over so you can respond better and more calmly.
Matte lipsticks can be tricky to work with. They tend
to dry out the lips, leaving your with rough, patchy and flaky pout. Not cute!
And while glossy lips can make you look charming, there’s something about matte
lips that make you feel bold and edgy. Pair a matte lip with smoky eye or barely-there
make-up look, it will still bring an extra oomph to the look that glossy lips
But is it really worth the patchy, dry lips? Luckily,
you no longer have to choose. We have listed down our top five favorite
drugstore matte lippies that aren’t drying and are affordable, so you can rock
a matte lip sans the flaking.
- Wet n Wild Megalast Lip Color
If you are like most of us
who feel the need to own a million shades of lippies, this Megalast Lip Color line is right up your alley. Retailing for no
more than S$7, these ultra pigmented, matte lip colors are a definite steal.
Try the crowd favorite Bare It All
shade, a universally flattering nude color.
Not technically a ‘lipstick’ though, NYX Soft Matte Lip Cream are among the newest innovation in the lip product department. A combination of the rich pigmentation of a lipstick and the hydration of a lipgloss, these lip creams come in a range of 22 shades, pricing at less than S$10 a piece.
- Maybelline Color Sensational Creamy
Matte Lip Color
In addition to their most
sought-after Color Sensational line, Maybelline’s Creamy Matte Lip Colors rewards
you with rich color pay-off and unparalleled hydration. Enriched with Sesame
Seed Oil and Beeswax in every tube, these lip products will lock in moisture in
your lips, while giving you that bold matte finish. All these gorgeousness
for S$8 (or less) a tube.
- L.A. Girl Luxury Crème Lip Color
Infused with aloe, vitamin E and shea butter, this line of matte lipsticks from L.A. Girl promise to leave your pout soft and hydrated while giving off vivid pigment. Comes in 24 different shades, you can choose from barely-there nudes to fiery reds and vampy plums for S$7 each.
- Milani Color Statement Moisture Matte
What could be worse than not
having a cup of morning coffee? Drinking your coffee and seeing your lipstick
staining your cup and smearing all over. Good thing Milani’s Color Statement
Moisture Matte Lipsticks don’t do this. The smudge-proof lip product comes in
eight different shades, which come at S$10 a piece.
Lipstick is a make-up collection staple. You may have
a hundred of tubes of lipsticks and lip creams, but make sure they make you all
look beautiful when wearing them.
Are you having wedding dress meltdown? Fear no more!
Here are expert recommended solutions to some of the most common wedding dress
- “Getting married in church, but
don’t want to be overly covered up.”
If you are not a fan of
turtlenecks and long sleeves, then boleros and lace cover-ups are a stylish way
to keeping your wedding dress looking conservative for the religious ceremony. Once
you get to the reception, you can easily remove these pieces to get comfortable
as you party the night away.
- “My wedding is in two months and I
still don’t have a dress.”
No need to panic! While it usually takes around six months for a custom wedding dress to be made, there are many other dress options for brides in a time crunch. There are so many bridal boutique in Singapore that accept rush orders that can get you a dress in a month—or even in a few weeks. Alternatively, try checking out off-the-rack dresses. This is a more practical option for brides on a budget.
- “Did I get the right dress? What if
it doesn’t suit me?”
Firstly, feeling of ‘dress
regret’ is normal, especially if you’re not done yet mentally shopping for
dresses. What you can do is to stop looking at wedding gowns. This means stop
searching for them in the internet, unfollowing instagram bridal accounts and
skipping dress sections of magazines.
- “I’m not a fan of white dress, but
my family is quite traditional.”
Although there are many shades of white to choose from, it’s totally understandable that not all brides are a fan of this color. But if you’re worried that you might disappoint the traditional culture of your family, need not fear. Wedding dress designers have embraces more pastel shades for their bridal collections. Champagne and blush pink are stunning options if you don’t want a big white dress. The color is very subtle that your family won’t even notice it.
- “I’m a plus-size, so what dress
style should I get?”
Go for an A-line dress; it’s
universally flattering. The elegant, clean lines and the flare from the hips of
an A-line dress give an illusion of narrower and linger torso. If you are quite
curvy, highlight your curves with a drop waist dress style to bring the
attention to your small waist and gorgeous bustline.
Wedding dress shopping is the most exciting part of
wedding planning. However, it can also be stressful when you have so many
things to consider before buying one. If you ever encounter any of these
wedding dress dilemmas, know that there’s always a solution for that, and that nothing
can stop you from looking beautiful on this very special day of your life.